Updated: Jul 5, 2019
It often surprises me when I hear about the language used around pregnant ladies, language that although well meant, can be harmful to a mum-to-be’s state of mind. And which can actually have an impact on the birth of her baby.
A prime example is comments on bump size:
Your bump is too big...are you sure there’s only 1 baby in there?
Your bump is really neat isn’t it...how far along did you say you were again?
I think we can all agree that in no way, shape or form should anyone comment on another persons body. Even if asked for your opinion you should always tread very carefully. So why then, do pregnant ladies become subject to public scrutiny over their bodies during pregnancy?
When you say to a woman, your bump is big - what they may hear is, you’re having a BIG BABY. Which then, because of our current society and medicalisation of birth, they begin to worry and panic that a big baby is a bad thing and they won’t be able to give birth. They’ll need interventions, which they don’t want. Panic sets in. Blood pressure rises. Interventions begin. Now I know this was not what you expected to happen, when you made a sweeping comment on the size of a mama‘s bump, however this is often the case. Because if you have commented, you can bet 10 other people have too. And they must be right, because there’s lots of them saying it...
It’s the same when we talk about “small” bumps. Except mum begins to wonder if baby isn’t growing properly. How upsetting would that be for our pregnant ladies?
The reality is every baby in utero, just like every human in the world, grows at different paces. And woman’s bodies respond differently to pregnancy, no two bumps are the same shape or size, and our bodies hold our babies in our own unique way.
Language in general is so important, and a badly placed word can change a sentence completely. But it is particularly important around women during pregnancy. Women who want to keep the positivity around them and focus on a beautiful pregnancy and the amazing birth of their baby. Should we all hold back our comments, our opinions? After all, it’s THEIR body, THEIR baby. Not ours. And - wait for it - their amazingly trained, women centred midwives will keep them and their bubbas in utero right, so why do we need to say anything at all? Why don’t we just say - mama you look amazing 💛
A big part of our hypnobirthing classes is unwinding all of the negative information that mums-to-be have heard from others or seen in films or on TV, and teaching them how to avoid negatives and cut out the bad language people use around them. And whilst our couples find this such a revelation and reap the benefits of this instantly, not everyone in the world does a hypnobirthing course. And sadly, not every person understands the language that they use can be harmful. Maybe by sharing a message like this, we can make a wider change.
So please, pass this on. Spread the word. Show this blog to people who are around pregnant women, and need to know the impact they might have. Let’s teach the world to be more aware, and let our precious pregnant women and their babies develop and grow in peace and love and positivity.
Much love, Intuitive Birth x